Fameless Future

(Photo from here)

For the first time in eight years, Idol is making its appearance on Portuguese screens. Since I was a little girl, I've always loved to sing and dance and rock out in my room with a can of deodorant replacing a microphone. To sum up, I've always wanted to become the next Miley Cyrus. I was obsessed (and still am) with talent shows like Britain's Got Talent, X Factor and Idol and always dreamed of being a part of it, but I was always too young of age.

Now, eight years later, I have the perfect age to participate. And I did send in my application. I waited for one month, and I never got an answer back while most of the other applicants did, and soon enough the Lisbon casting went by.

Yesterday morning, while I was having breakfast, I received a text message announcing the last casting, which will be even closer to my hometown. Tomorrow. I immediately freaked out and didn't know what to do. Should I go? Should I just stay at home and regret my decision?

I think I'll choose the latter, but without the regret. Even if I did go to the audition and make it through, I really wouldn't want to win the contest (I wouldn't anyway, but still). I don't want to become a singer. I want to be a fashion journalist. And although singing is a big part of my life and my friends like my voice, it's not my future. I'd go for fun, but waiting for hours and hours just to have fun for ten minutes or less? I don't feel like it.

I'll let my shyness and "talent" behind closed doors, with no cameras spying on me. I'll keep jumping up and down to Miley's tunes, pretending to be a rockstar while "airguitaring" to Bon Jovi and singing my heart out with my friends and at karaokes and be proud of it.

- Ana